Dove has been engaging in a campaign for women to think about how they see themselves and how others see them. How often do we repeat a negative comment that someone uttered once to describe our appearance? This is exactly what happens when women are asked to describe their face to an FBI artist who can’t see them. Their daughters are then given the chance to describe them. There are two sketches showing the results and it’s hard not to cry when watching this video and seeing the biased of our own minds.
Why Is it So Important How We See Ourselves?
If we truly think we look the way we describe, it will start to pervade throughout the rest of our lives. Others will feel that when they meet us, work with us, engage in conversations and even our families will sense our opinion of ourselves. The negative self-talk is something that women struggle with and this experiment highlights the importance of really taking a moment to adjust our thinking. So what can we do?
Three Things to Try Today
Record a message: first to yourself about how you see your face and appearance. Don’t think too much just say what you feel. Then ask your daughter to record how she sees you. Listen to both. How did hearing your daughter’s words make you feel? Re-set your thinking about your appearance and then re-record how you see your face now. Keep that recording and any time you feel doubt, listen to it.
Pass it on: now take this exercise and do it for your daughter. Although she is much younger, the negative voice has already started to creep into her mind. If possible ask her best friend to do the same. Create an audio evidence file that she can listen to whenever she starts having doubts.
Share Your Beauty: Think about how your negative self-thoughts may be holding you back with friendships, or at work, with colleagues, in social settings, with your family or your spouse. The next time you start to hear that voice remember how others really see you and smile from the inside out. Ask a friend to be your buddy and share this experience and remind each other how you both really are to others.
When we start to feel differently and understand how others see us, it lifts our confidence. We feel more bold, more courageous, more likely to take risks. Confidence starts from within and it is something that is practiced to make stronger. As a role model for your daughter, she will see that by you, trying and feeling more confident, she can as well.
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