Thinking back on your past was there a moment when someone made a casual comment to you that had a lasting impression? Chances are it might have been something a parent or relative said about your weight, clothes, grades, or sports performance. The way that comment made you feel may have stayed with you and without realizing it shaped how you view yourself.
In a recent Podcast “How To Raise Confident Adults And Self Sufficient Kid” on The Chalene Show, Chalene Johnson shares profound advice that reminds us to be mindful of our actions and words when we are around our kids. Our best intentions may turn out to be their lasting memories. Here are actionable ideas you can use with your daughter.
Four Tips To Improve Confidence:
- Body Image: How you feel about yourself is felt by your daughter. If you are feeling like you don’t look good in a pair of jeans even if you keep that thought to yourself your child can sense that lack of confidence and they start to question how they look. Body image is one of the biggest issues girls in their tweens to early 20’s struggle with and it starts with how Moms talk about it. This is a tough one for any woman but keeping our thoughts to ourselves and smiling at how we are on the outside will have positive impact on our daughter’s self-image.
- Finding Balance in Setting Expectations: One of the traits we learn from our parents is what to value about ourselves. If they tell us we need to always get an A or they won’t view us with respect it puts enormous pressure to succeed. If we can find the way to balance expectations with realism so that the child feels valued no matter the outcome it will go a long way to how they are in the workplace as an adult.
- Praise Who They Are: When we focus only on outstanding accomplishments and not on the incremental wins we are teaching our children that they have to be perfect. This sense of perfectionism will limit their ability to execute on projects as they grow older. Instead, if we praise them for doing something out of the ordinary like making a friend laugh when they were having a bad day it will reassure your daughter is appreciated for who she is and not for what she does.
- Support Independence: It can be tempting to want to help our kids fight their battles. At school especially if they are having trouble with understanding a topic in a class it is important she learns how to approach the teacher herself. Having a sense that she is more than capable of solving the issue together with the teacher will help your daughter believe she can do it.
When we feel confident it transfers to our daughters. If you are unsure how to erase those feelings of self-doubt the Courageous Confidence Club is a great resource to learn step by step how to feel better